My Shingle

The Girl Is Gone

by Carolyn Elefant on August 27, 2014 · 3 comments

in MyShingle Solo, Work Life Balance

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onedowncapI saw it coming a year ago but that didn’t prepare me for the reality that she is no longer here. Oh, sure, she’ll be back but as a visitor or a guest, not a resident of this house where she grew up. Only two days have passed since I dropped my daughter off at the designated kiss-and-cry before she joined her orientation group.  Yet there’s an emptiness in the house and my heart that lingers, while daily flotsam and jetsam of life are a constant reminder that the girl is gone. The Safeway where she bought baking supplies. The drive-through window at the bank where I’d sometimes let her press the buttons to withdraw cash. Our Prius, which she proudly drove everywhere after getting her license earlier this year. The adjacent bedrooms that she and her sister shared, and the giggling and squabbling that routinely emerged every night. Too quiet now. The coffee shop where I walked with her as a baby in her cadillac baby carriage and sat mesmerized for hours, just staring at her staring at the world. togocap

Seventeen years seems like a long time but it flies. As much time or as little time as we make for our kids, we always wish for more. But in the everyday chaos that is life, we forget that there’s an expiration date that we never counted on coming so soon, and don’t notice it’s passed until they’re gone.

  • shg

    Be strong. It’s painful, but it has to be. Do what I did when my babies left. Cry a bit. It helps.

  • Charlene Ross

    I loved this. I’m where you were a year ago with my son. This college stuff is overwhelming, but I know it will be over in the blink of an eye. Thank you for such a sweet post today.

  • Ventura Lawyer

    Two years ago for us, Carolyn – for our oldest. Two more behind him. I didn’t see it coming, and I wasn’t prepared for the feelings. It gets easier. Not better, but easier.

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